Resource: I'm struggling

I'm a Christian but I need help.

Addiction. Anxiety. Depression. Anger. Suicide. Violence. Financial Ruin. Disillusionment with Religion.

If you are dealing with any of the above and if any of the judgements below resonate with you, then we have good news...

We’re very disappointed in you!

We wish you’d commit yourself to trying harder!

Don’t you know that you’re harming yourself. Get a grip and change!

If you were a better Christian, you wouldn’t struggle with that sin!

You’ve got kids and a family. You have got to do better!

Real Christians don’t act that way. It’s time you get serious with God.

It’s all in the mind. You need to be more committed and sort yourself out!

Being a Christian doesn’t mean you won’t struggle with serious issues. All believers struggle with something in their lives. It’s just that many are experts in hiding it. For some, their struggle has a greater hold on them than on others. For some, theirs have escalated to full blown addiction. Some of the struggles have such a grip on minds and hearts that it becomes impossible to think of anything else.

You’ve tried to fix yourself: You’ve prayed. You went to church. You went for counselling. You watched Oprah and you bought the book. You’ve tried hard to supress and go cold turkey. And still nothing, zero improvement. You’re left with even more embarrassment, more shame and more guilt. Why can’t I get free of this thing?

There are two major lies that are associated with this topic. Believing these lies will actually cloud your judgement and decision making on this journey of getting free.

What should I NOT be thinking?

• Lie #1 You are alone. Actually, you are not alone. People who struggle are made to feel they’re the only one who is fighting this particular area. That is not true at all. Many men battle pornography, many people are fighting depression and suicidal thoughts, many struggle to control their anger and experience violent outbursts. The issue is that many people don’t have victory over their struggle, so they’d rather not talk about it for the fear that others will think less of them. We hide, we mask and we keep silent. And this leads to the misconception that we’re the only one facing this particular struggle. It’s simply not true.

• Lie #2 No one will understand. Because we feel we’re the only ones struggling, then we assume that others couldn’t possibly understand. We believe they’d be judgemental because they’re ignorant. The reality is that the person you have the courage to speak to about your struggle is facing a struggle of their own. Once the lie that no one will understand or sympathise with you is exposed, it’ll be easier for you to share with someone you trust.

Where is God in my struggle?

If you’re a Christian, the answer is simple: He’s with you. Is He disappointed with you? Is He angry with you? No. Scripture tells us that Jesus sympathises with us in our weaknesses. It says that we should cast our burdens onto Him for he is able to sustain us. God is not angry with you because you have suicidal thoughts. He’s not angry with you because you have an addiction to porn, gambling or drugs. On the contrary, He loves you! He sympathises with you and is with you in the struggle. He’s not going to bail on you now!

What should I be thinking?

Scripture tells us that our thinking mustn’t be like that of this world but we should renew our minds. In other words, we should train our minds to think what God’s saying about us and the life we’re supposed to be living. As we begin to think according to God’s Word about us, transformation happens. When the testing time comes, we are able to see and choose what is good.

1. Believe your identity in Christ. Do not allow your struggle to disqualify you in your thinking. You are a child of God. You are the righteousness of God. Your sins have been washed away. Despite the struggle you’re facing, your identity in Jesus remains intact. Your shortcomings, your failures or your addiction will never change that. You are a new creation Christ. He who began a good work in you is faithful to complete it.


2. Freedom is possible. The scripture tells us that it is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Paul writes in Romans that to those who are born again have in fact died to sin and have been set free from sin. We should consider ourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus. The more you believe that this is how God made you and this is your lot in life, then freedom will be almost impossible. When you believe the scriptures about struggle, then you move into a place of faith. God’s purpose for your life is not for you to be imprisoned by death, destruction and addiction. He set you free in order to be free.

Jesus is the only way

The Gospel casts a bright light on the religious lies that being a better behaved Christian gives you more brownie points with God. More effort, more obedience, more striving, more church attendance, more prayer times, more fasting... more, more, more…will lead to God loving you more and blessing you more. It’s just not true. Our faith must be on the finished work of Jesus and not on our own efforts. This doesn’t just apply to salvation. The Gospel is about all of life. Freedom from addictions won’t come through stronger will power, trying harder and applying more effort. Our freedom lies in trusting Jesus Christ.

Freedom is found in no one else but Him. Believing the Gospel and renewing your mind to what God’s Word says about you is the foundation upon which freedom will come.

On a Practical Note

You cannot always beat struggles alone – and therefore, it is not just OK, but it is essential and good to have people to walk alongside you, motivate you and help you to become aware of any blind spots. This is necessary for you to feel supported and accountable. It is important to note that the people supporting you should not be accepting of your behaviours; that won’t be helpful in a healing journey, but they should be accepting, understanding and loving despite your struggle. Make sure to surround yourself with those who will keep Jesus and His Gospel message at the centre of your healing journey whilst supporting you too.

If you would like to meet or speak with a leader or pastor at Highway, to speak further about anything relating to the above, please contact us.